"Don't screw up the best thing in your life
just because you're a little unsure about who you are."

I don't know how many married guys can recall it, but I know the exact time I decided to finally take the plunge with Chrissie. It was about an hour after I watched Nicolas Cage's Family Man, a full-wonder story about a wealthy Wall Street guy, Jack, given a glimpse of the non-wealthy life he could have lived had he not gotten on a plane and be separated from his then-girlfriend almost 2 decades ago.

The transitional moments, from big-time dealer to small-time salesman, are hilarious. Used to waking up alone or with girls he just met, Jack wakes up with a wife and two kids and a dog jumping all over him. He rushes away to his sky-scraper to see his name - next to President - replaced by his junior. He tries to get into premium condo but the doorman doesn't recognize him and blocks his entrance. He struggles to change his baby son's, Josh, diapers. He has to ask his daugher, Annie, what the after-school S.O.Ps' are. He curses when his junior appears on TV shaking hands with a two corporate presidents whose merger his (ex-)company has arranged.

But then Jack learns - or discovers - the joy of loving and living in spite of financial want, in spite of the no-cushion savings, in spite of not having that suit which makes him "feel like a man" (but which requires taking out his kids' education fund). He misses his trappings of status but grows to love Kate, Annie and Josh more than anything in the world. The quote at the start, by Arnie his friend, captures Jack's seizing and holding on to a family he knows he loves without having to figure out entirely this new world he's been thrown into.

Sorrow beckons, though, when he realises he has to 'leave' this dream-like alternate reality which he started out hating but ended up cherishing. When the moment comes, it's full of dread, because he's back to his old super-wealthy but no-family life. He drives to the house belong to "him and Kate" but there's just a guy there who doesn't know any Kate. The real Kate is now a hot-shot lawyer, who's just packing up and about to transfer to Paris.

Final drama arrives when Jack rushes to the airport looking for Kate, and trying to stop her before she flies off. Remember we are already in the "real world" and Jack has stopped 'dreaming'.

He creates some commotion because Kate is already at the departure gate and about to board, and she keeps saying, "Jack, do you need closure?" which is probably what any woman would say if her boyfriend from 15 years ago, started pestering her about what "could have been". Kate then turns towards the gate and walks away. Jack is about to give up when he suddenly turns to Kate and desperately cries out to describe the alternate reality he's lived through with an alternate her:

"We have a house in Jersey. We have two kids, Annie and Josh. Annie's not much of a violin player, but she tries real hard. She's a little precocious, but that's only because she says what's on her mind. And when she smiles...

"And Josh, he has your eyes. He doesn't say much, but we know he's smart. He's always got his eyes open, he's always watching us. Sometimes you can look at him and you just know he's learning something new. It's like witnessing a miracle.

"The house is a mess but it's ours. After 122 more payments, it's going to be ours. And you, you're a non-profit lawyer. That's right, you're completely non-profit, but that doesn't seem to bother you.

"And we're in love. After 13 years of marriage we're still unbelievably in love. You won't even let me touch you until I've said it. I sing to you. Not all the time, but definitely on special occasions. We've dealt with our share of surprises and made a lot of sacrifices but we've stayed together.

"You see, you're a better person than I am. And it made me a better person to be around you. I don't know, maybe it was just all a dream. Maybe I went to bed one lonely night in December and I imagined it all. But I swear, nothing has ever felt more real.

"And if you get on that plane right now, it'll disappear forever. I know we could both go on with our lives and we'd both be fine, but I've seen what we could be like together. And I choose us."

Little did Cage & Co. know that six years later, there would be another movie with another husband, another wife and another two kids (plus another dog which looked like the dog in Family Man). This movie is also about family and getting a glimpse into a major What-If. Whilst Cage started out in a scenario he did enjoy and ended back in the same situation he later detested, the main character of this movie starts out being "tired with his life", but ends back in the same situation an entirely changed man, thoroughly grateful for the life he has (as opposed to the life he thought he had lost).

I'm talking about Adam Sandler's Click. But I won't ruin two movies at one go (smile), so I'll end with the theme which unites these two masterpieces: Family is first, the job is completely secondary. Never take for granted the ones who love you, no matter what riches beckon and no matter how attractive alternatives may appear to be.

(And if you'd like to listen to the airport dialogue between Jack and Kate, just, well, click).